Friday, November 25, 2005

Thanks

Thanksgiving is a holiday of just plain joy and thanksgiving, with no overlays of guilt or shoulds like the other holidays.

This year was different from other Thanksgivings in a lot of ways. Our all-time best one was in '99 when we celebrated not only turkey day with family but bringing home a son from the hospital after almost 4 weeks in ICU, now finally on the mend.

2005 comes in a close second place. 2/3 of our sons were off having their own adventures (South Georgia farms! Africa!), and we'd already seen the grandparents last weekend, so this Thursday seemed off balance somehow. We invited more family, albiet at the last minute, but other than uncle Charles and our oldest son's dear mother in law (who was stuck home waiting for the immenent birth of her next grandchild), everyone else was off having other adventures.

We were adventureless.

It was our first year without all our kids, and our 21 pound turkey seemed way out of proportion to our little group of 5. We invited another couple but they were iffy about coming. I set out my good china. (I have service for 20 just in case everyone were to show up at the same time.) I picked flowers for a centerpiece. Should we take the leaf out of the table?

We did everything "right" but still things felt off balance.

Some of life's learning you have to learn over and over. After Mama died, our family learned a hard lesson. No matter how much you want to, you can't ever make things back just the same. You can knock yourself out trying, but it won't ever be right in the same way you remember so fondly. You have to craft new ways of doing things.

Something clicked. The sun got warmer and warmer. The radio kept calling it a "glorious" day outside. Our iffy friends called and said they could make it after all. We set up a folding table on the deck and carried our dishes and centerpiece outside to enjoy Thanksgiving al fresco! Charles had brought his guitar, so we had live music, good food, warm sunshine in November, and we made up a new right way to have Thanksgiving that worked for this year. My sister called from the beach to say she had seen dolphins from her window.

Who knows about next year? Maybe we won't all be here. Maybe there will be a grandbaby for us. Maybe we'll have an African daughter-in-law and decide to have Thanksgiving there. Who knows? This year - this time and this space - was good.

And I'm thankful.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Beach break


Sometimes I think if we all watched the sunrise and sunset every day we'd have a much more peaceful planet. Sleepier maybe, but more peaceful.